Guiding children through feelings of anger; a guide for carers


Anger is something that everyone experiences and it is a feeling that can occur in children as young as three or four months old. When young children are unable to effectively manage their anger, it can lead to aggressive behaviour. As a carer, you can help guide children through their feelings of anger so that they can express their anger through words rather than aggressive actions.

1] Create an environment where all feelings are valid – both pleasant and unpleasant ones, so children know that even their feelings of anger are allowed – it is only the actions that need to be limited. Restore a sense of calm and safety – don’t give them a ‘time out’ but ensure you sit with them and help them through their feelings so that they know they aren’t alone with their feelings, which might be scary for a young child.

2] Encourage children to talk about their feelings of anger. Children will be better able to understand these emotions when adults explain it to them. You can use books and stories about anger to help them understand the feelings. Talk about examples of anger and frustration and also about appropriate responses to those feelings.

3] Ensure that you yourself and modelling appropriate responses to feelings of anger, as children will pick up on the way you respond to anger and will tend to copy that behaviour. Children learn about how to handle disagreements and conflicts from watching you.

The Wishing Well foundation

The Wishing Well was established in 2010 to offer children in out-of-home care, such as foster care and residential care, a range of healing and treatment options usually not accessible as a free therapy in mainstream health.

The Wishing Well raises funds to enable children and young people to access developmentally-appropriate and trauma-informed treatments shown to be highly effective in dealing with severe trauma and neglect. These therapies respond to the unique needs of each child and young person.

The Wishing Well is a not-for-profit incorporated charity organisation, established and managed by people seeking to improve outcomes for children and young people in out-of-home care and their families. The Wishing Well recognises the importance of the act of giving. We recognise the significance of the participation of community members and all donations are most appreciated.

The Wishing Well operates ethically, effectively and empathically with a view to achieving quality outcomes and a satisfying working environment.

Support the Wishing Well

The Wishing Well uses its funds to help children in need access all manners of developmentally-appropriate and trauma-informed treatments. The Wishing Well takes referrals for any child/young person in out-of-home care in NSW.  Applications are assessed by qualified personnel and on a case-by-case basis.  The decision to fund an application is affected by the following:

  • Funding availability
  • The support the child/young person has to access the proposed therapies
  • The capacity and willingness of the Carer Household to support the child/young person
  • Assessment, which recommends and supports the proposed therapy as relevant to meeting the particular needs of the child/young person


The Wishing Well gratefully receives donations, funding and resources through bequests, corporate partnerships, fundraising events, grants, online donations and other fund raising activities. Money donated to The Wishing Well enables traumatised children access to healing therapies. Please see our website for more information:



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